And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
