Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Randomize
