I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
