he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
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