How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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