Texts From Last Night

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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink

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  (609): apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink http://tfl.nu/9o16
  Replies (37) Good night (1129) Bad night (2520)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.

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  (513): Oh no, it isn't official until she poops. http://tfl.nu/gc75
  Replies (20) Good night (823) Bad night (3555)
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  (682): View more from Texas

  aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow

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  (682): aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow http://tfl.nu/8wvu
  Replies (29) Good night (6327) Bad night (1167)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.

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  (604): Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating. http://tfl.nu/sjit
  Replies (35) Good night (13719) Bad night (1159)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.

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  (586): just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me. http://tfl.nu/oae8
  Replies (26) Good night (8868) Bad night (858)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.

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  (919): I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all. http://tfl.nu/fj96
  Replies (7) Good night (3161) Bad night (1033)
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.

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  (514): He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic. http://tfl.nu/4dpi
  Replies (38) Good night (12277) Bad night (1284)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??

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  (717): at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea?? http://tfl.nu/j9re
  Replies (9) Good night (2305) Bad night (1132)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE

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  (480): I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE http://tfl.nu/wmq4
  Replies (5) Good night (2428) Bad night (1284)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.

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  (602): I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex. http://tfl.nu/gy7w
  Replies (13) Good night (3605) Bad night (1200)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.

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  (508): There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him. http://tfl.nu/gfad
  Replies (7) Good night (1586) Bad night (944)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever

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  (785): You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever http://tfl.nu/34h5
  Replies (2) Good night (1345) Bad night (530)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.

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  (224): i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing. http://tfl.nu/a3ha
  Replies (5) Good night (495) Bad night (1097)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.

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  (812): we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever. http://tfl.nu/pdge
  Replies (1) Good night (836) Bad night (242)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."

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  (757): ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY." http://tfl.nu/eo1b
  Replies (2) Good night (537) Bad night (213)

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