Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize