90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
