Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
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