My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
