sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Those nachos came to me in a dream
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
