why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
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