we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize