So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
He passed out mid-signature
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
