that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
