i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
