I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
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Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
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You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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