So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
i already hear my dad disowning me
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
