just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
