C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
