i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize