we have officially lost it.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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