playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
