honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
