it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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