How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
