When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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