even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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