Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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