i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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