Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"

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  (407): I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!" http://tfl.nu/fhku
  Replies (40) Good night (1623) Bad night (6090)
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  (915): View more from Texas

  i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure

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  (915): i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure http://tfl.nu/p6xi
  Replies (22) Good night (3517) Bad night (1579)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings

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  (605): For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings http://tfl.nu/sahq
  Replies (30) Good night (2846) Bad night (861)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.

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  (256): We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life. http://tfl.nu/312f
  Replies (43) Good night (5992) Bad night (723)
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  (315): View more from New York

  Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..

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  (315): Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka.. http://tfl.nu/lv2f
  Replies (20) Good night (4483) Bad night (993)
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  (707): View more from California

  At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.

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  (707): At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve. http://tfl.nu/oxx2
  Replies (3) Good night (3427) Bad night (757)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy

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  (972): Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy http://tfl.nu/ylro
  Replies (5) Good night (717) Bad night (2852)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter

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  (330): I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter http://tfl.nu/ep47
  Replies (7) Good night (3208) Bad night (1039)
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  (951): View more from California

  I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street

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  (951): I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street http://tfl.nu/tl0c
  Replies (7) Good night (928) Bad night (2146)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.

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  (816): It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one. http://tfl.nu/pa8f
  Replies (1) Good night (1157) Bad night (455)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.

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  (267): I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with. http://tfl.nu/vaw3
  Replies (14) Good night (680) Bad night (770)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him

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  (518): Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him http://tfl.nu/dlpo
  Replies (9) Good night (1248) Bad night (430)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking

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  (919): my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking http://tfl.nu/q3af
  Replies (5) Good night (446) Bad night (282)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room

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  (828): You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn. (828): Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room http://tfl.nu/vl43
  Replies (2) Good night (1004) Bad night (226)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman

  (1-630): View more from Illinois

  Best superhero ever to exist

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  (630): I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman (1-630): Best superhero ever to exist http://tfl.nu/bh1h
  Replies (6) Good night (1003) Bad night (248)

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