i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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