The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Randomize
