well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
