Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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