Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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