i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Randomize