Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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