Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize