Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize