I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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