this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
