Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
