She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
