It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
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I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
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Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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