Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize