we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
