My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
