She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize