there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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