do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
